Friendship Panel
Friendship
Written By: Mentor Mom Kathy Van Duyn
Proverbs 27:17 “As iron sharpens iron, so one (wo)man sharpens another”
After Melanie started with some fun friendship facts we could all relate to, we were treated to a discussion panel that included longtime friends Debbie and Bobette, as well as kindred spirits Kris and Amy.
We all need close relationships with other people we trust and respect. Husbands can be our best friends…but they just don’t do girl talk like our peeps! Our lives will include many kinds of girlfriends. Some are lifers, some are for a season. Some are deep, some are silly and fun. They advised us that when it comes to BFFs to keep your circle small, but to always be inclusive as you surround yourself with a variety of levels of friends in your circle.
“Friendship is born at that moment when one person says to another, ‘What! You too? I thought I was the only one.”– C.S. Lewis
“You can make more friends in two months by becoming interested in other people than you can in two years by trying to get other people interested in you.”— Dale Carnegie
Some people make friends easier than others. Woman are complicated…and they are hard on themselves. We battle with feeling less than others when we walk in to a group of women and we don’t see their faults, only our own. Comparisons brings disappointment, but friends are strangers waiting! By getting to know them you will soon find out they are not as perfect as you thought and deal with the same issues in life you do. By investing time in someone, you will soon be saying “I can’t believe I told you that…where have you been all my life!”. The panel shared that to make a real friend, you have to be one. We need to open up and let other women in, and that means letting them know our struggles if we expect them to share theirs. We need to train ourselves to be a good friend and that includes being intentional and investing in them. It’s taking the time to remember both the little details about them, as well as the big things going on in their lives. It means times of laughing with them until you pee, and sometimes crying with them. We should treasure and protect our relationships. A true friend rejoices when the other is enjoying life, and is not jealous or resentful…it’s not all about us!
No friendship is without drama!! There will always be ups and downs. The panel encouraged us that we need loyal friends that will pray with us and are affirming, yet not afraid to call us out in love and point us to Christ…and often this can cause hurt feelings. True friends are honest and forgiving with each other, and sometimes the upheaval requires praying about it, waiting for emotions to calm down, and not running from it but talking things out…this can often be when the true blessings happen.
The panel also shared stories about friendships not always working out, or being on hold for a season. When we experience what we feel is rejection, we often don’t understand it (what’s not to love?) Sometimes we need to set boundaries when relationships are one sided and friends are negative and needy. We need friends that are there for us and love all of us….just not the parts that work for them. Sometime friends are just for a season. Not everyone is going to like us or be a fit for us and we need to extend grace and be okay when they pull away.
“A friend is someone who understands your past, believes in your future, and accepts you just the way you are.”
All the ladies shared about the importance of having friends to stand in the gap for us. Often when we are going through hard times we isolate ourselves and hold it in and try to ride it out on our own. We need friends that walk alongside us and love us unconditionally through life when we experience hardships such as loss, divorce, miscarriage, infertility, and a multitude of other things that can change life in a moment.
The panel concluded by encouraging us to keep Christ the center of our lives, and that when we have all we need in Christ we can enter in to our friendships satisfied. This requires spending time with God and getting to know Him just like a friend, and learning His qualities so we can practice them on others. Who do you need to reach out and love on today?
Recommended Reading:
Link to purchase the book:
Comments
Post a Comment